Neutrality is not a new concept. Lost your job? Neutral. Marriage sucks? Neutral. Found the love of your life? Neutral. It’s all neutral. It’s all just an experience.
Your mind gives “good” or “bad” interpretation to it, but ultimately…neutral.
What are you resisting in your life now?
You know that what you resist persists. We all know that.
Theoretically sounds great – just stop resisting the situation. Be in it. Accept it and see it dissolve on its own.
Stop worrying about money. Stop worrying about your marriage. Stop worrying about – how much longer I am going to be here. Here… where I don’t want to be anymore.
When will Change come? Easily and effortlessly. Preferably without me doing the hard work.
My divorce has been going on forever already. I am so ready to be over with it. But it doesn’t seem to end any time soon. How do you not resist something like this?
The thing is – it won’t end until I accept Here and Now. Until I stop resisting. Hard work might not be necessary but dropping resistance is.
Sometimes it might happen naturally – when you are resisting something for too long, eventually you’ll get tired. You’ll say – who cares. But it might take awhile to get to that point. Often it works faster to consciously decide to stop resisting.
“When you surrender and stop resisting and stop trying to change that which you can’t change, but be in the moment, be fully open to the blessings you’ve already received and those that are yet to come & stand in that space of gratitude … and look at where you are and how far you’ve come and what you’ve accomplished …- when you can claim THAT and SEE that, the literal vibration of your life will change.” Oprah
This quote goes perfectly with today’s post. Few things that help me to stop resistance are:
1. Compared to what?
Each time you notice yourself judging anything as good or bad, ask yourself – compared to what? I don’t like how my body looks. Compared to whose body? My relationship with my partner could be better. Compared to what? I don’t have enough money. Compared to what?
When you ask yourself those questions you realize that your good or bad are so relative. Then you realize that everything is neutral. Then you realize that you are doing much better than you thought. And then hopefully you stop resisting as much.
2. Physically relax into the situation that causes resistance.
Think of your situation. What do you resist? What are you unhappy with? Feel the resistance and tension in your body. Now breathe into it. And relax.
3. Most importantly stop resisting your own resistance. I’ve done that for awhile. If you are already resisting a lot and the situation really sucks (according to your mind’s interpretation, of course… but still), admit it. Claim it. Say that it sucks. And that you hate it. And wish it was over …like RIGHT now.
Only after that do steps 1 and 2. Denial is not necessary.
And then keep reminding yourself that everything is just an experience.
Look back at your life. I bet you’ll remember many situations when what looked not so good at the time turned out to be for the best after all. It truly is all for the best. There is a lesson in everything. The one that will bring you closer to who you are meant to be.
Stop resisting. Let go.