Your relationships with other people hold the key to your relationship with the world and with yourself.
Do you know that the qualities that we are most annoyed with in others are most likely the qualities we posses ourselves and unconsciously blame ourselves for?
The first time I learned about it, I thought: ” No, this is not true, there is no way I am as selfish as my husband is” Which was something that bothered me a lot at the time.
After looking more inside, I found out – “Yes, I am.” That is exactly how I was and that is exactly what I didn’t like about myself. So as a result I found the same quality in the person close to me and was upset about it.
Now when I look closer at all of the relationships I ever had in my life, I always see a part of me in them. I see a part of me in those people. Often it is the part that I was consciously unaware of, but unconsciously this part was screaming to get my attention.
As soon as I become aware of it, as soon as I bring it to light, learn the lesson, forgive and let go, the relationships that bothered me either automatically improve or the person gradually disappears from my life.
Look at the relationships you have right now. Do you have any relationships in your life that bother you? Here are some of the things you can do:
You are not a victim of the circumstances and you didn’t end up with the relationships you currently have by chance. Stop blaming the person you might be angry at now. See beyond anger or blame or any other negative feeling you might be experiencing toward that person.
Look inside and find the part of you that is screaming for your attention.
Find the lesson. The person you might be so annoyed with or angry at is teaching you a lesson. And as soon as you see that lesson and bring to light that part in yourself, the person will change or disappear altogether. There won’t be any need for that particular part of those relationships anymore.
If you think that someone is acting disrespectful towards you, see how you might be acting the same way towards other people or even may be towards yourself.
Do not blame. Please do not fall into trap of blaming yourself for being this way or thinking that there is something wrong with you that you need to improve. We don’t need to improve ourselves. We are perfect already.
All we have to do is to awaken to being light and happiness that we were always meant to be. Any imperfection that we presumably have comes from negative beliefs that we hold about ourselves. Most of those beliefs are so deeply embedded into our subconscious that we don’t realize they are there.
If the lesson you learned is showing you that you are a selfish person-it is not that you are selfish. Your true self is not selfish. It is an unconscious negative belief about yourself that says you are selfish. Change the belief and you’ll stop acting in a selfish way automatically.
Forgive first. Again do not start blaming or feeling guilty. That won’t help. Bring that part of you or that negative belief of yours to light and forgive. Say: “I forgive you and I let you go now”.
After that just promise yourself to stop acting that way and believe that you can do it.
Focus on loving yourself. Love is the answer to everything. If you don’t love yourself, you’ll never love anyone else. You don’t need to improve yourself. All you need is to love yourself more and that love will unfold the light and wonderful being that you already are and spread that light to other people in your life.
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