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“Mark my words, if you want to stay competitive in the coming years – I don’t care if you’re in sales, tech, finance, publishing, journalism, event planning, business development, retail, real estate, you name it – you will still need to develop and grow your personal brand . Everyone-EVERYONE-needs to start thinking of themselves as a brand. It is no longer an option; it is a necessity. “   Gary Vaynerchuk, Crush It

If Facebook was a country it would be the 4th largest country in the world. Youtube is the second largest search engine after Google. Twitter, Linkedin, Tumblr, Flickr… What are those social networks all about?

Personal brands.

We live in the era of personal brands.

Your personal brand is what sells your services, gets you hired, helps you develop relationships. Your personal brand is what makes your business recognizable and sets it apart from others.

Here is where a lot of people get stuck. Everyone tells you that you have to create a unique and compelling brand. And you probably have been thinking long and hard what your brand is all about and how you can make it unique and different.

Let me tell you the truth that you already know.

You don’t need to create a brand. You don’t need to come up with anything unique and different.

Why?

Because you ARE a brand already.

And this brand of YOU is as unique as it can get. You can try long and hard but you won’t find anything more unique than YOU. You are one of a kind. Don’t look any further.

All you really need to do is embrace your DNA, get clear on your core message and learn to clearly communicate that message to the world.

That’s what authentic branding is all about. And authentic brands are the ones that crush it.

Here are some of the steps that will help you:

1.  Get clear if the business you are in is really the business that resonates with who you are.

Are you passionate about what you do? Is it YOUR business? The best test to find out if you are truly passionate about something is to ask yourself

2. Get clear on your core message.

What is unique about you? What is your story? Come up with a compelling tagline that clearly communicates your message.  Brainstorm for ideas until you find the one that resonates with you. Don’t do anything else until you find your core message. This is the most important step.

Your brand starts with your authentic core message.

3.  Get clear on your Ideal Customer.

The clearer you are on who your Ideal Customer is, the clearer your message is going to be.  Getting clear on your Ideal Customer is a whole blog post in itself, so I’ll write about that later, all I want to say here – don’t be afraid to narrow down as much as you can.

Who is he? How old? Is it he or she? What does she do for a living? What dreams does he have? Kids? Married? What else do you know about your Ideal Client?

Can you imagine how much more clarity you get by knowing exactly who you write your book or your blog post or even Twitter and Facebook updates for.  Your website copy, your sales pages – everything is going to be transformed once you know exactly who you are writing for.

After you’ve got those basics covered, it’s time to start communicating your brand to the world.

4. Make sure that everything you do communicates your message in one way or another.

When people land on your website they should understand within 7 seconds what you are all about. Your blog posts should communicate that message directly or indirectly. Everything you put out there should be put out with your core message and your Ideal Client in mind.

5.  Be consistent.

Have the same look and feel on every platform you are on online.

Logos are overrated, often your picture and your unique style is enough to create consistency. But logo can serve the same purpose too.

Make sure your style is consistent with your message. Meditation retreat with a tagline Rejuvenate your mind and calm your soul and a busy website with crazy colors – Not Good.

Start with you. Then go from there.

I love simplicity. I love Clarity. Look at my website. Clear. White. Simple. I also love color red. Fire. Passion. Again, look at my website. Look at my logo. Look at my Twitter and Facebook. You get the point.

6.  Start blogging.

I don’t care what business you are in, if you are not blogging yet, start. Blogs show the personal (human) side of you and your business.  Blog tells your story. People want to buy from people. Stories sell.

7.  Tell your story.

You have a story. We all do. What’s your story? How did you come to where you are now? Tell us about your failures, about your successes. Why are you qualified to solve the problem that you are solving?

The about page is usually one of the most visited pages on blogs and small businesses websites. People want to know your story.  They want to know You.

8.  Don’t write from the third person.

Your customers will connect with you much quicker when you write from the first person.

9.  Don’t try to please everybody.

It won’t lead you anywhere. Speak your message.  Don’t apologize for who you are. There will always be critics, but those who connect with you, will follow you everywhere you go.

10.  Be YOU. Don’t be afraid to show your personality.

I like color red. I am introvert. I hate small talk.  I am vegetarian.  I am from Russia and I speak with sexy accent. I sometimes make mistakes when I write blog posts. My man just started checking some of the stuff I write, but overall it’s all me. Raw and unrefined.

What about you? Your customers/readers/followers want to know YOU.

“Be yourself, everyone else is taken” Oscar Wilde

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Along with the ups and downs of my divorce and the unexpected entrance of a new {amazing} relationship into my life, I was doing a lot of inner work to help me gain more awareness and clarity and get rid of some of my fears that I had.

Some things scared me. Some didn’t surprise me at all. One of the biggest fears I became aware of that was literally determining what I did professionally, my relationships (especially romantic relationships) and much more was my fear of rejection.

Most of it was coming from my childhood and the fact that I grew up without a farther and always felt rejection because of his absence in my life. This fear explained a lot of the things to me starting from why I dated a certain type of man, relationship patterns I had with friends and family members to why I often tend to procrastinate starting something new and big and why I always had a desire for standing out, being noticed for who I am.

Anyway, this post is not about my fears. I became aware of them and let them go. At least I hope I did.

This post is to tell you about my professional or “vocational” plans for the future and some of the lessons I learned on my path.

Getting clear on my fear of rejection helped me realize that I was afraid to embrace and claim my true value. I believe a lot of us do that. I never fully believed that what I have to offer to the world is truly useful and valuable.  (Plus what will others say about me?)

We often take what we already know for granted. It seems to us that no one really needs what we have to offer or that they already know it or that there is someone else out there who is more qualified than we are to do what we want to do.

Even though all of us, all without exception, have some knowledge or skill that others would benefit greatly from, we often resist to fully embrace it.

There will always be someone out there who knows more than you do. But there will always be someone who knows less and who needs you to share your knowledge and experience with them.

People who need you and what you have to offer will come to you.

All you really have to do is to embrace your gift and start offering it.

I was always too scared to call myself a business and/or branding coach. I thought that my reputation is not enough to back up my claims. (What will others say about me? What will they think? – Fear of rejection kicking in)

And even though I have great success stories from my clients, I didn’t feel qualified. I needed someone to give me validation.

The only person who can validate you is you yourself.

I realized that if I truly believe in my value and if I see tangible results from people who worked with me, all I have to do is to offer. Those who need what I have to offer will come. Those who don’t  – won’t.

It really is that simple (by the way, you are also absolutely allowed to reject clients, this way you can truly work only with those who you feel you can help).

I’ve done clarity sessions in the past helping people get clear on their authentic vocation. I am taking it further now. I now offer business brainstorming sessions where I can help you get clear on your unique value, your authentic brand, your core brand message and much more. And I also start offering branding packages for those who are starting out.

I’ve done that in the past already. I just called it differently.

I still feel highly uncomfortable calling myself a coach. So we’ll brainstorm. Sounds so much better to me.

This blog will always be about clarity and self-discovery as those are the cornerstones of everything I do but I’ll also start writing about entrepreneurship, marketing, discovering and branding your passion.

I also plan on starting local workshops related to authentic branding.

Fully embracing and allowing myself to be who I am has been a long journey but I don’t regret any step of the way.  All of those steps were leading me closer to my vision.

What is your value that you are looking for validation in order to fully embrace? What do you want to do but don’t feel you are fully qualified to start doing? Where in your life does fear of rejection stop you from fully sharing your unique gifts with the world?

Claim your value. Give yourself permission to be who you want to be. Sharing your gift is truly the only thing that matters.

Allow yourself to do it. The World validates you.

P.S. My divorce is coming to a conclusion for those who are wondering. Thank you for all of your support, guys, and for sticking with me. I feel bad because I kept promising to start writing on the blog consistently again and didn’t keep my promises. All I can do is admit it and move on now. Life is coming back to normal and I am back to sharing my journey with you here on this blog.

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Neutrality is not a new concept. Lost your job? Neutral. Marriage sucks? Neutral. Found the love of your life? Neutral. It’s all neutral. It’s all just an experience.

Your mind gives “good” or “bad” interpretation to it, but ultimately…neutral.

What are you resisting in your life now?

You know that what you resist persists. We all know that.

Theoretically sounds great – just stop resisting the situation. Be in it. Accept it and see it dissolve on its own.

Stop worrying about money. Stop worrying about your marriage. Stop worrying about – how much longer I am going to be here. Here… where I don’t want to be anymore.

When will Change come? Easily and effortlessly. Preferably without me doing the hard work.

My divorce has been going on forever already. I am so ready to be over with it. But it doesn’t seem to end any time soon. How do you not resist something like this?

The thing is – it won’t end until I accept Here and Now. Until I stop resisting.  Hard work might not be necessary but dropping resistance is. [click to continue…]

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I hope

My dream comes true

I hope

My dream is you

I know

My love is endless

I know

I will give you my best

I will

Honor and worship you

I will

Love and protect you

I can

Make you happy and loved

I can

Give you the love from above

Short but true

I love YOU.

This poem was written for me 7 years ago by my soon to be ex-husband. He wrote me over 100 poems since then. I’ve been rereading them all today remembering how this Love started.

These days we have hard time speaking with each other and some of the things he does make me think –where did love go? [click to continue…]

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In the past few weeks I’ve been going in and out of the state of depression without realizing it. I don’t even want to use this word here  – depression. Too strong for me. I never viewed myself as someone who would experience something like this.

I am an optimistic person. Sometimes to the point of where it is stupid. The sky might be falling and I will be standing there and thinking –It is for the best. And everything truly is for the best. But sometimes being always positive and optimistic is not the best thing to do.

In the  last few weeks I went numb. I bet you noticed that considering there was almost no posts on this blog.

Main reason? My divorce. Divorce that I tried so hard to make not a big deal out of.

Let me tell you. It is a big deal. Freaking big and quite stressful deal. Especially when there are kids involved.

For whatever reason I was afraid to admit it. I was afraid to face it.

I painted a nice picture in my mind of us peacefully getting divorced but staying best friends who share a child and spend time together often. Didn’t quite work out that way. We are to the point of hardly speaking with each other.

And our son is in the middle of it all. I so wanted to prevent him from seeing us like this. He sees it all now.

So there I was. In the middle of a quite stressful divorce trying to convince myself that it was not a big deal. I would repeat over and over again to myself and everyone else around that it was just an experience. I am moving to a better place. Everything is good. I would also throw a joke there when someone asked.

Complete denial. [click to continue…]

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When I got married 5 years ago I told to my husband at the time that I wanted to be a stay at home mom. I was so burned out at the job I had that I sincerely believed I didn’t want to ever work anymore and would be satisfied raising kids and taking care of the house.

The husband was thrilled with the idea, that was what he wanted his wife to be. The idea was nice theoretically, but didn’t last too long.  I got bored and got a job 3 months after we got married.

When my son Nicholas was born I realized that I can’t take him to daycare and I don’t trust babysitters, at least while he was little. That’s where the dilemma started. How can I be someone who is not just a stay at home mom and at the same time stay at home with my baby? Home-based business was the only logical answer. So my business started not as a result of me wanting to follow my passion. Passion came later. It started as a desire to do something meaningful in the world and stay at home with my son at the same time.

Fast forward couple years.

I tried many business models online. Made money. Lost money. Scratched everything and started over.  Rediscovered my passions. Decided to get divorced. [click to continue…]

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